For the last decade or more, I have been saying that one of the most destructive behaviors in life is avoidance. To understand this statement, we must qualify that it depends on what we are avoiding. It’s wise to avoid evil, sin, and all kinds of influences, including a rattlesnake.
Yet, I am referring to when we avoid what we need to face. It may be a task that needs to be tackled, a sin or addiction that needs to be faced, an apology that needs to be given, and repentance that needs to be sought. It may be avoiding a confrontation that needs to be made. It may be avoiding salvation and Jesus Himself. It commonly is avoiding emotional wounds that need healing.
My decades of counseling have involved seeing the damage that avoidance has brought to so many. All of us have likely experienced damage from avoiding when we shouldn’t have. I have avoided my treadmill and have the damage to show for it.
Some avoidance has caused more hurt than others. I grieve as I hear and realize that certain hurtful outcomes in people’s lives could have been AVOIDED if they hadn’t of AVOIDED what should have been dealt with years ago.
As I recently listened to a couple describe their current family problems, we all realized that it didn’t have to have become so dysfunctional if they had faced and dealt with some issues and patterns long ago. Yet, like in most cases, some were willing to face and deal, while others were not. Typically, there’s a vital person who is avoiding that can derail the progress that could come.
The older I get, I also realize that not only can avoidance be destructive, but that the only one we have power over is ourselves. We can’t make others stop avoiding. We can’t make others face harsh reality or difficult changes that need to be made. We can only choose for ourselves what needs to be faced and not avoided. I encourage you to review your life and ask the Lord to reveal if there are areas you are avoiding that need to be faced. I know I sure have some!